So yesterday I went to a Crystal Meth Anonymous meeting at a rehab centre.
No, not for myself. I went to support a friend in recovery who was leading the meeting. It was a small group of people, about 15. Some just arrived, some had been there for weeks, some months. Some knew exactly when they were leaving rehab, some had no idea. Some were there because they came themselves, some were dragged there by their families, some were ordered there by court, some came from jail.
One by one they spoke about whatever was on their mind and in their heart. What they were grateful for, what challenges they were facing in recovery, what they were hopeful for, what they were scared of. There were tears, there were smiles, there was uncertainty, there was fear, there was insecurities, there was belief, there was hope, there was laughter, there was openness, there was a strong yearning for something radical and different. More than anything there was honesty. As everyone went around the circle and spoke, I listened and observed as each person shared. They were open and so eager to absorb any information to help them conquer themselves. And it occurred to me once again, (although I already knew this but it just came to me in a different way through different voices), that the biggest obstacle, the biggest challenge we will ever have to face in this life, is ourselves. I was so touched by everyones courage, not to just get clean, but to face themselves.
It takes courage to truly look at ourselves, to introspect, to dwelve deeper, to dig way down, to get to the core of who we are, to keep asking questions, to keep unravelling why we are here. A whole lotta courage. Daily courage. But that courage and hard work brings miracles. That conscious awareness and dedication to self-improvement brings personal power. And personal power leads to an empowered, meaningful existence.
FACE YOURSELF. CONQUER YOUR FEARS. OWN YOUR CRAP. UNRAVEL YOUR TRUTH.
FORGIVE YOURSELF AND KEEP MOVING FORWARD.
LIFE IS PRECIOUS. YOU ARE PRECIOUS.
I realized as I sat in a room of addicts that there was no place in the world that I would rather be in that moment. This was real and I was honoured to be in the presence of truthful living. No lies, no social masks, no false personas. It was a pleasure to witness and absorb. I understood their pain and suffering because I have battled my own intense addiction issues many times with sugar, compulsive eating, alcohol, & drugs. They all reminded me what it is to be human. They reminded me to keep going. To keep working on believing in my own unique greatness. That I am worthy. I matter. You matter. He matters. She matters. We all matter. And most of all, this beautiful group of honest people, my teachers that evening, reminded me to keep facing myself. Because the more I face myself, the more I release the things that are holding me back from connecting to inner peace…..to universal abundance…..to universal love…..to the magic that life holds. And isn’t that what we all really want?
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