by Svetlana Lilova, Psychotherapist
Only being whole affords us true happiness – that unfurling of becoming more of ourselves, with trust in our spontaneity. The truth is that there are ways to integrate our ugliest, most hurtful, or shameful, or weak parts of ourselves. Equally, we can accept and integrate every need that fuels our actions, including our wild, masculine, feminine, mischievous, creative, reflective, child-like, alive, or you-name-it parts of ourselves. We can thrive, beyond surviving, and therapy can hold out the process.
When engaged in a meaningful conversation with a skilled professional, a person begins to hear one’s longings and needs, discover words for what is churning inside, explore and connect the unresolved to past experiences, make sense of everything, fine-tune into one’s self, and discover choices. As one of my leading teachers, Les Greenberg, puts it, we need to arrive in order to leave a place. And learning how to work with emotions allows for that arrival.