1 year after my mom died and I receive this gift

As a little girl, I used to give my mother presents on her birthday that I made because I didn’t have any money. I remember once saving up quarters and dimes that I collected from the streets over a period of time and bought her a mug that said I love you Mom. She used to get angry at me and tell me not to waste my money because she was sick and her life meant nothing. She never acknowledged my gifts. She hated my gifts. It would hurt me very much because I was just trying to express my love for my mother and I was continually rejected. As an adult now who has worked so hard on forgiveness and compassion, I see now how sad, pained, and tortured she was. It wasn’t about me. But at the time, as a 5, 10, 15, 20 year old child I became scarred. My mother was indeed very sick her whole life and she often did take out her suffering and anguish on me. For most of my life her pain became my pain. And perhaps there will always be some of her pain that resides in me until the day I leave this earth. But everyday I work on healing my heart and making peace with my past. And isn’t that what life is all about? Making peace with our pieces so that eventually there are no pieces and we are